Why Substance Abuse and Intimacy Issues Go Hand in Hand

Addiction is, at its heart, a disease of isolation and secrecy. People who consistently misuse drugs and alcohol do so as an unhealthy coping mechanism that helps them mask unpleasant thoughts and feelings and makes uncomfortable personal interactions go more smoothly.

For example, perhaps you have unresolved issues with trauma, and drugs or alcohol have become a way for you to avoid thinking about the past. Or, maybe most social interactions make you feel anxious, so when you go to parties, you drink to the point where you feel more confident in socializing with others.

Reasons Substance Abusers Struggle With Intimacy

Many people with substance misuse disorders struggle to relate to other people and form close personal bonds. For obvious reasons, problems like childhood sexual abuse, anxiety and depression give rise to strong feelings of shame and guilt that tend to make people withdraw from society. The connection also leads to the urge to self-medicate and sweep those problems under the rug.

To make matters worse, many people who have underlying intimacy issues begin relying on drugs and alcohol to self-medicate relatively early in their lives, often in their teens or early 20s. As soon as they begin to form their addictive behavior, it stunts the process of emotional growth that forms the foundation of healthy adult relationships.

Often, those who enter recovery report feeling stuck at the emotional level of however old they were when they first began abusing substances. In other words, someone who began drinking or using drugs in high school will probably have the same emotional maturity as a 16- or 17-year-old until they eventually start their recovery journey and resume the process of growing up.

Others start off with deep-seated intimacy disorders that fuel their substance abuse, which in turn exacerbates their intimacy issues. Either way, for many people, substance abuse and intimacy issues become equal halves of a vicious and destructive cycle.

The Costs of Substance Abuse on Relationships

While addiction takes its toll on every relationship in someone’s life, the hardest-hit relationship is often the one between the drug or alcohol abuser and their spouse or partner. As the addiction escalates, it starts to create an emotional divide between the partners that is challenging to overcome. Worsening alcohol and drug use also leads to more arguments, which can sometimes become violent. In some cases, this tension can create an environment in which the partner with the addiction begins to rely on their substance of choice more and more to reduce stress and avoid having to think about the extent of the problems.

There are several telltale signs that drinking, drug use and self-destructive habits by an intimate partner are causing tension within the relationship to the point that drug rehab may be necessary to stop the cycle.

• Drinking or drug use is one of the only activities the partners like to do together.
• Domestic violence sometimes becomes an issue when a partner has been drinking or using drugs.
• One or both partners need to be drunk or high to become sexually intimate or to discuss the problems in their relationship.
• The substance abuser’s drinking or drug use has become the source of many arguments about failure to take care of household responsibilities, lying about where they are going or what they are doing, staying out too late, etc.
• The non-addicted partner has had to make excuses for the drug or alcohol abuser by apologizing to others for their behavior or calling in sick when they are too high or hung over to report to work.
• The partner with the substance misuse disorder drinks or uses drugs to alleviate tension or stress related to household conflict over their substance abuse problems.

Is Addiction Harming Your Relationship?

Don’t let drugs and alcohol destroy your life. Regain control with Complete Harmony’s cutting-edge holistic rehab program. Our professional California rehab team takes an individualized approach to healing every facet of the body, mind and spirit. Speak to one of our recovery advisors today to make a fresh start.

How to Spring Clean Your Mental Habits

Spring is the season of growth and renewal and this goes for your emotional health, too. In fact, the next few months are the perfect time to purge yourself of any negative thoughts and emotions that could be interfering with your full recovery. Here are a few steps to clear the “mind weeds” and “plant the seeds” for healthier mental habits this season and beyond.

• Identify your stressors. Stress is one of the leading causes of relapse, so there’s no better time than now to take action. Your first step is to figure out some sources of stress; try keeping a journal. Next, test out some relaxation techniques to calm anxiety and relieve tension. Some ideas: exercise, meditation, yoga, massage.
•  Dig up a long-overdue apology. A heartfelt apology can help reduce guilt and internal discomfort and regrow a damaged relationship with a loved one.
• Release your grip on a grudge. Along the same lines, forgiving yourself or someone else can help free up emotional energy so you can focus on more positive aspects of your life. Sure, it’s normal to experience emotions like anger and hurt, but allowing these feelings to fill up your heart will hurt you and your recovery.
• Sweep away self-criticism. This will definitely take some practice, but you can do it. In fact, uttering phrases like “I can do this” or “I’m doing my best,” is a great first step. Another important part is making an effort to recognize that you will make mistakes and that it's okay as long as you learn from them and move onward and upward.

Continual Self-Growth at Complete Harmony
Our team of credentialed clinicians can help you explore your own recovery journey while learning to heal relationships and build a sober social network. For more information about our cutting edge treatments, call today: 866-930-4673.

Let Get of Those Emotions (The Healthy Way)

The road toward sobriety can feel like an emotional roller coaster. After all, you’re likely experiencing a wide range of emotions – from hope to anger to anxiety – as you embark on recovery. And you may not always understand why. 

Take heart: You can take steps to slow yourself down, embrace your emotions and move to a healthy, calm state. And these techniques will serve you well as you continue to fend off relapse after rehab.

Start with these five ideas to tame emotional tension and release those worries:

1. Just breathe. But make it formal by focusing on your breath. The next time you’re overwhelmed by stress, anger or anxiety, close your eyes and inhale slowly. Then, slowly exhale to release those emotions and calm down.
2. Hone in on your creativity. Whether you decide to color, paint, play an instrument or write poetry, a little creativity can go a long way in helping you work out any negative emotions. 
3. Make meditation matter. This mind-body technique can help you move through those “stuck” feelings. This is because meditation teaches you to fully feel (without judgment) your emotions and then release them as you move to a place of healing. 
4. Start journaling. And don’t sensor or judge your words. Freely writing (or typing) out your emotions will help you let them go. Take 10 minutes and give it a try. 
5. Give yourself permission to cry. Or to laugh or to scream – or whatever you need to do (within reason) to feel better. While you don’t want to make this a habit, it’s OK to feel your emotions fully once in a while. 

Finding Emotional Support at Complete Harmony

At Complete Harmony, we use a combination of traditional and holistic treatment methods to help you manage your feelings without resorting to substance abuse. To learn more, call us today: 866-930-4673.

Simple Steps for Soothing Self-Care

Some people say self-care is the foundation of addiction recovery. If you’ve completed rehab and/or an aftercare program, you’re likely familiar with the role self-care plays in your recovery and long-term sobriety.   

You may even know that self-care goes beyond just bathing, eating right, and exercising. It means nurturing your physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and financial health. And it doesn’t have to be time-consuming or costly. 

Here are just a few self-care tips you can put into action today: 

• Snuggle up with your loved one.
• Sit down with a good book; perhaps one that inspires you to become a better person.
• Sip a warm cup of herbal tea.
• Begin your mornings with a few yoga poses to clear your mind and energize your body.
• Head outdoors and soak up the sun as you take a long, relaxing stroll.
• Sit in a bubble bath and tune out to your favorite tunes.
• Organize your desk and tackle one pile of paperwork or bills.
• Light a scented candle and get creative by coloring, drawing, painting, or writing poetry.
• Give yourself a facial or pedicure.
• Wake up early and watch the sunrise.
• Pop some popcorn and cue your favorite Netflix series.
• Pour yourself a tall glass of water infused with cucumber or lemon.
• Sit and focus on your breathing. Close your eyes and let go of your worries.
• Make a list of long-term recovery goals. 
• Jot down five things you’re grateful for. 
• Set the alarm a few minutes early and stay in bed and meditate.

A Healthier Lifestyle With Deeper Purpose

At Complete Harmony, our holistic relapse prevention plans provide the tools you or someone you love needs for lifelong sobriety. After recovery, our staff encourages you to continue holistic therapies and find groups and community resources that support your commitment to sobriety. To learn more, call 866-930-4673.